I'm ok
by Caz Malfoy
Summary: Inspired by Christina Aguilera's song, I'm ok. From Draco's PoV, slightly angsty, and HD slash of course. COMPLETE


AN: This is my first attempt at anything even remotely angsty. I've decided I can write a full story on it, so I've thrown some slight fluff in between.

It was inspired by Christina Aguilera's song, 'I'm ok'. But please don't let that put you off because you don't like her.

If you like this story please review cause I would love to hear what you think, although no flames please.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, etc. belong to J.K. Rowling and the lyrics to 'I'm Ok' belong to Christina Aguilera and her record company. And no profit is being made from the reproduction of these lyrics.

I'm Ok

"This can't go on Draco," I hear his voice whisper in my ear as he strokes my hair, and holding me close to his chest, trying to soothe me. I have to agree with him, this isn't the first time memories of the past have come back to haunt me, and he's right, it can't go on. I don't want it to.

But what can I do? Nothing except a sleeping potion will allow me to sleep for a full night. And using a memory charm is out of the question, I can't run away from my demons, no matter how much I want to, no I have to face them.

It's all my father's – no, Lucius' fault that these memories haunt me. He hasn't been my father since I was ten. Since the day I saw him hurt my mother, his wife, merely because she was there.

Once upon a time there was a boy 

_In his early years he had to learn_

It was late, nearly eleven o'clock, on a cold November Friday night. My mother had been telling me a story; I think it was a Muggle one. One of those fairytales that never fail to have a happy ending. Even after eleven years I still remember sitting on her lap listening to her soft voice flowing over me as she read from the book, which she kept hid from her husband. I refuse to call him my father. By the time the prince and princess had been wed, my eyelids were like lead, getting too heavy for me to keep open. She noticed this and closed the book, "Come on sweetie, lets get you to bed," she whispered in my ear.

I tried to reply but I was too tired, so I merely nodded and snuggled further into her arms as she picked me up and carried me up the stairs to my room, which was on the first floor of our Manor, a place I haven't set foot in since I was twelve, and I never intend on setting foot in there ever again.

Before I knew it I was in my pyjamas and had the blue goose feather quilt pulled up to my chin.

"Mummy?" I murmured sleepily. I didn't usually call her 'mummy', most of the time I called her mum. But in the company of others, Lucius included, I referred to her as mother. Even now I call her mummy when I'm incredibly upset or scared, not that I would ever admit this to anyone of course. "When will my prince come?" 

She chuckled softly and kissed my forehead, "Draco you won't have a prince. But you'll find yourself a beautiful Princess to marry and you'll have lots of beautiful boys and girls that have blonde hair, and blue eyes. They'll look just like you, darling."

Of course, considering the circumstances now, she couldn't have been more wrong. For my Prince did come, it just took six more years for him to appear.

I could hear the rain beating down on my windowpane, "Try to get some sleep sweetheart," she whispered. I nodded my head and closed my eyes, slowly drifting off to sleep, "Goodnight Draco," she said, carefully kissing my eyelids.

" 'Night mummy," I replied, smiling slightly, and feeling myself slip off into the dream world, the last thing that I remember before I dropped into unconsciousness was the bedroom door softly closing as my mother left.

How to grow up living in a war that he called home 

_Never know just where to turn for shelter from the storm_

It's amazing what you remember from your past. Even though I've just turned twenty-one, I can remember exactly what happened that night, right down to what colour my pyjamas were.

When I woke it was still dark and raining outside, I wasn't sure how long I had been asleep, but I knew it can't have been that long. I lay in bed, listening to the rain beating on my window, the steady beating of the droplets falling against the glass, soothing me.

After a time of lying there listening, I don't know how long for, a matter of minutes? Or hour's maybe? I got out of bed to go to the toilet.

I slipped out from underneath the warm duvet, my feet sinking deep into the soft carpet that covered the whole of my bedroom floor. Quietly I walked over to my bedroom door, and slowly opened it, not wanting to make a noise and get caught out of bed by Lucius. He had never hit me for breaking the rules; the most he would do to me would be reprimand me for being out of bed past midnight.

I opened my bedroom door and slid out into the dark corridor, full of shadows that always seem to move out of the corner of your eye. The bathroom was on the opposite end of the corridor to my bedroom, and I remember thinking to myself, I wish I would apparate down there, to stay away from the shadows.

I took a deep breath and ran down the corridor, as quickly and quietly as I could. Eventually I reached the large oak door, which concealed the bathroom behind it.

A few minutes later I emerged from the room, and was just about to run back to my room, when I heard a quiet scream come from downstairs. Curious, I tiptoed over to the top of the stairs and looked between the gaps in the banister. Looking through the gap, I could see the landing downstairs where Him and my mother were.

It hurt me to see the pain across my mother's face 

_Every time my fathers fist would put her in her place_

"Shut your mouth," he snarled at her as he backhanded her across the face. She gasped as her hand rose to her cheek, thankfully her gasp of surprise drowned out my own.

He backed away from her slightly, and she stood upright, obviously thinking that he wouldn't do anything else to her. But she was wrong. She let out another small scream as she felt his hand close around her throat, pushing her backwards and pinning her against the wall.

"Lucius!" she gasped out, struggling against his grip, trying to get his fingers away from her throat. "Let me go," I heard her plead with him, and for the first time that I could remember, I could hear fear starting to seep into her voice.

"Don't you tell me what do bitch," he shouted, not releasing his grip on my mother.

"Please," she begged.

But he didn't loosen his hold, if anything he seemed to tighten it. She let out another gasp and I could have sworn that she looked up at the landing, at me.

"Don't," she murmured. "Go," this time she definitely looked at me, and I could see straight into her eyes. And I saw fear, but not for her, I realised, but for me.

I nodded my head and tiptoed back down the corridor, sticking to the shadows, no matter how scared of them I was. Slowly I opened the door to my room and slipped inside, before quietly closing it behind me.

I slipped under the covers again, and pulled the quilt up to my chin, closing my eyes, trying to forget what I had just seen, but no matter how hard I tried, the image of her being held against the wall by Lucius kept seeping into my thoughts.

As I tried in vain to block out all the pictures and thoughts out of my mind, I rolled over and buried my face in the pillow, my tears soaking into the soft material.

Just then the door opened and I stilled, holding my breath, not daring to move.

"Relax sweetie, it's only me," I heard a soft voice whisper as the door closed. I rolled over on to my back and looked up at her as she sat down on the edge of my bed next to me. She reached out a hand, and gently wiped my tears off of my cheeks, "I'm sorry my Dragon," she whispered, kissing my forehead.

"Mummy?" I asked, my voice sounding smaller than ever.

"I didn't want you to see that," she said. Looking back now, I can tell by the sound of her voice that the whole scene that had played out downstairs, had happened to her before, although that thought never occurred to me at the time. "Don't you worry about me Draco," she added, reaching into a pocket on her dressing gown. As she moved, her neck became exposed and I could see purple bruises on her neck, bruises in the shape of fingers, from where his hand had been holding her. "Drink this sweetie and it'll make all the pictures of what you just saw go away," she instructed, uncorking the small glass vial, which contained a blue liquid, and handing it to me.

I nodded my head and took the vial off of her and downed the whole thing. Instantly my eyes felt heavy again. My mother kissed my forehead again, "Goodnight Draco," she whispered. "I love you darling."

"I love you too, mummy," I replied before falling asleep under the influence of the potion she had given me. Now I recognize it as a dreamless sleep potion.

Hearing all the yelling I would cry up in my room 

_Hoping it would be over soon_

I must have fallen asleep in Harry's arms, because the next thing I knew, I was being awoken by a small child, a six-year-old child to be precise, climbing onto the bed, and pushing his way in between myself and my lover, who merely opened one eye to see what was happening, before sliding over to the edge of the bed to make room.

"Xavier?" I asked my little brother. "What's wrong?"

Xavier looked up at me. Sleepy black eyes staring at me from beneath long blonde eyelashes. "I had a nightmare, Dray. Can I sleep with you and Harry tonight?"

"Of course you can, Xav," Harry murmured sleepily, putting an arm around him. "We won't let the scary things get you," he promised.

Xavier smiled at him and cuddled closer to Harry's warm chest, drifting back off to sleep. I couldn't help but smile at them. They looked really cute, cuddled together and sleeping soundly. I moved closer to them slightly, and carefully put my arm around Xav too, lightly resting it on top of Harry's, and drifting off to sleep myself. 

Bruises fade father but the pain remains the same 

_And I still remember how you kept me so afraid_

The rows between my mother and Lucius didn't stop there. For many nights after that all you could hear throughout the manor would be Lucius screaming at the top of his lungs. Sometimes he screamed at her because of something she did, or forgot to do, but most of the time she hadn't done anything wrong at all, and he was only shouting at her because he felt like shouting at someone, and she just happened to be there. Later on she told me that she would have left him as soon as he started mistreating her, but she was too scared of what he might try and do to me.

I don't actually remember what exact arguments were about, it was so long ago and they happened so often that my memory has blended them all in to one. But I do remember one time, during the summer between my first and second years at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Lucius had just come from somewhere, I don't know where exactly. And to tell the truth I'm not too sure I want to know where he had been.

My mother and I were going from my room upstairs to outside, I think she was going to help me practise Quidditch, in the sheltered outdoor courtyard. I wasn't on the team at the time, although Harry was playing for the Gryffindor's, thanks to me. I remember, Lucius was furious with me when he found out how he had got on the team; after all, it was because I threw Longbottom's Remembrall towards the school. And Harry being the heroic Gryffindor that he was, no matter how hard he tries to deny it, flew after it. Of course he caught it, and McGonagall immediately put him on the Quidditch team. 

He came in through the front door, it had been raining heavily. So he was dripping water all over the floor, creating a large puddle of rainwater around him. When our house elf, Dobby I think it was called, arrived to clean up the water, Lucius kicked it and told it to get lost. Lucius pulled his knee length leather jacket off and threw it in the direction of Dobby. It landed on top of the ugly little creature, burying it. That was quite funny actually.

He set his snake headed cane to one side, before pulling his gloves off, one at a time. He threw them in my direction, I think he expected me to catch them and play house elf or something. I stood there with an eyebrow raised as one of them hit the centre of my chest and fell to the floor, followed by the second one.

It took two strides for Lucius to stand in front of me. "Why did you put them on the floor?" he snarled at me.

"I didn't," I protested, I was eleven at this point, I was still afraid of him but I wasn't about to be told off for something I didn't do. "You threw them at me. Did you expect me to catch them and play house elf?"

His eyes widened in fury, "Don't you dare talk back to me you little brat," he snarled again. I only had time to quickly note to myself that he seemed to snarl a lot, before he raised his hand and slapped me across the face. It made me jump, and because I wasn't expecting to be slapped, the impact of his palm on my cheek made me lose my balance. I fell backwards and landed on the marble staircase, wincing as I felt the edge of the step dig into the base of my spine.

"Lucius!" my mother exclaimed. "Don't you dare touch him!" she threatened. 

Lucius merely looked at her with a raised eyebrow before snorting, apparently thinking something was funny, "You're threatening me?" he asked incredulously, before turning his back on her and stalking down to the other end of the entrance hall, where there was another staircase, leading to the wing of the manor that he claimed as his.

Once he was out of sight, my mother turned around and crouched down in front of me, "Are you okay sweetie?"

I nodded my head, and stood up. Immediately I felt pain in my lower back, and frowned, "Actually I don't think so," I said. "My back hurts."

"Come upstairs and we'll sort it out, I can't have my little Dragon feeling pain now can I?" she asked, smiling at me, trying to make me feel better. And I have to give it to her, whenever she hugs me, or smiles at me, she make me feel like all the evil things in the world have disappeared. I've never felt anything like that before, the only other time that that feeling has ever been rivalled is when I'm with Harry, or in his arms.

Strength is my mother for all the love she gave 

_And every morning that I wake I look back at yesterday_

_And I'm ok_

What felt like nearly ten minutes after I had fallen asleep again, I felt something wet and rough on my face. Thinking that I was dreaming or imagining things I batted the wet annoyance away, determined to go back to sleep. Just then a low quiet growl came from in front of my face, and I could feel something heavy pressing against my chest.

I opened my eyes, and blinked a few times as my eyes tried to focus. When they did, an angry looking white and black striped face slid in to view. So that's what that wet thing was, I thought to myself as I pulled a hand out from under the covers. "Good morning, Snowy," I said, reaching to stroke the small snow tiger cub that was sat on my chest, still growling at me. Snowy growled at me again and swiped at my hand with a paw, it didn't get me though.

Snowy was Xavier's pet snow tiger. Harry had only just bought him it for his sixth birthday. It was still only a cub; it had been taken from his mother very early because she was old and unable to take care of her cubs. Harry said he had been passing the Muggle zoo when he saw them take them to the animal sanctuary that they kept orphaned or abandoned animals in. He fell in love with them immediately, and decided that a snow tiger cub would be the perfect present for my little brother.

"I'm sorry Snowy," I apologized. I learnt years ago never to piss off an animal, magical or Muggle. "I was half asleep, I didn't realise it was you." If animals could frown I would say that Snowy just did. He looked at me for a few seconds before stopping growling and allowing me to stroke his fur, before getting off my chest and walking to the end of the bed, curling into a small black and white ball.

I rolled over, intending to lay on top of Harry, watching him sleep, before kissing him thoroughly to wake him up. But as I rolled over I was shocked to see that Harry was already awake and that he had been watching me sleep. "Good morning, love," I said, leaning closer to him and kissing him on the lips.

"Good. Morning," Harry moaned into my mouth between kisses. "God, you look so adorable when you sleep," he whispered huskily. I pulled back slightly and smiled at him, "Thanks, so do you," I replied, before leaning closer, intending to capture his lips with mine again. However something under the blankets between us started wriggling and there was a muffled exclamation. "And that would be Xav that you just squashed," Harry laughed, shoving me back over and pulling the blankets off my brother, who I had actually forgotten was there.

"Good morning Xav," Harry said, sounding far too cheerful for first thing in the morning. "Did any of the scary monsters come back?"

Xav shook his head, "No, they went when I came in here."

"See I told you, me and Draco would protect you from the scary things," Harry reminded him sweetly. Xav smiled up at him, and cuddled closer into Harry's strong embrace, still smiling, "Thanks Harry," he whispered. Harry smiled down at him and kissed the top of his blonde head.

"Hey," I mock-exclaimed, pretending to pout. "Don't worry about me guys, I'll just get attacked by the scary monsters."

Xav lifted his head and looked at me, "Monsters don't come out in the daytime Dray," he chuckled, looking at me like I was stupid for even suggesting different.

"What if they make an exception for me because I'm so handsome?" I asked pretending to sound scared. This time it was Harry's turn to chuckle, "Stop being such a drama queen, and get your ar-bum over here," he said, just remembering to catch himself before he swore. My mother would kill us if she found out that Xavier had heard us swear.

I often wonder why I carry all this guilt 

_When it's you who helped me put up all these walls I've built_

Xavier isn't my real brother. But only in the sense that his blood is different to mine. We both have the same surname, same mother, same father, and same family. Just because Lucius was the person who contributed when I was conceived, doesn't make him my father.

When I was twelve, my mother decided that she wasn't going to take anymore of Lucius' treatment of her, and I think what he did to me before I left for Hogwarts just helped make her decision easier.

When I arrived home after my second year, I had a little surprise waiting for me. We had just been through the whole Chamber of Secrets mess, what with the Muggle-borns getting petrified and everything. Lucius was extremely pissed off about something. I wasn't sure what at the time, but Harry told me later, that he had been the one who gave Ginny Weasley Riddles diary and started the whole fiasco off in the first place.

My mother threw something down on the table in front of him, "These papers just came in," she stated clearly, her voice not showing any emotion. "They're very important and need to be signed immediately so they be processed as quickly as possible."

He gave a frustrated sigh, before picking up his quill, "What are they for?" he asked, while he signed on the dotted line at the bottom of the page, not even bothering to read the papers that he was signing. As soon as he wrote the last letter of his surname, the wad of parchment, that was several hundred pages long, glowed, and there was a clatter of metal hitting the floor.

"Divorce and custody papers," she replied simply, picking her wedding ring off of the floor. One thing about Wizarding marriages that different to Muggle ones is that once a person is bonded with their spouse they cannot remove the wedding ring, until the day that they either divorce or if one dies. "You just voided our marriage and agreed to sign custody of Draco over to me, with no visitation rights," she elaborated as she picked the contact off of the desk, before turning on her heel and leaving the room, leaving a very stunned Lucius Malfoy behind.

I had just arrived back from Platform nine and three quarters (via portkey), therefore I hadn't unpacked any of my school stuff. As a matter of fact, they were still sat on the floor next to me by the door, having only just walked from the front gates. Normally my mother or Lucius came to pick me up either at the station or the front gates, but no one had arrived this year, just a short, straight to the point, note from Lucius, saying that he was too busy to come pick me up. The only reason I know what happened in the study is because my mother showed me it, when I asked her why he agreed so easily. I was actually impressed with her, I would have never have thought to trick him into signing them.

"Come on Draco," she said, rushing down the marble staircase and hugging me briefly. Before helping me pick up my school trunk and taking it back outside. I was confused but picked my owl cage up and followed her, "Mum, where are we going?" I asked her, setting down the cage on top of the trunk.

"Away from here Dragon," she whispered. "Far away," then she stuck her wand hand out and seconds later the giant purple Knight bus was standing in front of us, and the conductor hopped off.

"Ah, Mrs. Malfoy, Mr. Malfoy, nice to see you again," the name said, sounding very professional.

"Nice to see you too Stan," my mother replied, also sounding very professional. "But please call us Narcissa and Draco. Could you please ask Ernie to take us to this address," she requested handing him a piece of parchment, with the address written on. 

Stan nodded and handed the piece of paper to the driver Ernie, who merely nodded and began to rev the engine up again as my mother and I hopped on board.

Soon we arrived outside the small two bed roomed terraced house that she had bought while I was at school.

"Mum, why did we leave the manor?" I asked, watching as she opened the front door to the house.

"Lucius and I have gotten divorced darling," she explained. "You'll never have to see him again," she promised.

"Really?" I wanted to believe her, but my heart was telling me that it was too good to be true. She nodded, "Really my dragon. We're free," she added, smiling brightly, and hugging me. I grinned as well, and even surprised myself when I felt tears off joy sliding down my cheeks.

For the next year or so it was just my mother, and me and we were perfectly happy. Lucius had tried to fight back against my mother, but he gave up when his lawyers told him that the divorce and custody papers were legit. And there was nothing they could do to try and get custody of me, or at least visitation rights.

When I arrived home for Easter during fourth year my mum had a surprise waiting for me. I knew something was up immediately, because as soon as I asked her what was wrong she told me that I was the most important person in her life and that she loved me more than anything else in the world.

She told me she had been seeing someone for the past six months and he had asked her to marry him.

There was no other word for what I was feeling, I was stunned, to say the least. I'm not going to say that I thought my mother was never going to meet another guy that she loved, because I knew that it would happen at some point, I just never realised that the day that I wasn't the only man in her life might come quicker than I expected.

I didn't want to believe that my mother had some one else in her life. Part of me was scared for my safety, after how Lucius had treated me, but the rest of me was scared for her. I had seen what Lucius had done to her, and seen how he had managed to turn her into a shell of the woman she had been when she married him.

She told me that she really loved this mystery man, and he loved her back. She promised me that he was nothing like Lucius. She said he was sweet, charming, considerate, and intelligent. When she had finished her explanation of this charming, gentleman, I had to admit that I was curious about who this man was. But she refused to tell me, saying that he would come by and I would be introduced to him properly then. I spent the next couple of days trying to figure out who this mystery man was. Then eventually there was a knock on our front door. 

I was the one who opened it, and was surprised when I saw Hogwarts' potion master Severus Snape on the doorstep. "Professor, what-," I began but was cut off as my mum came into the hallway.

"Severus you finally made it," she exclaimed, ushering him into the hall. "Draco I believe you already know Severus?"

My mind was spinning, and eventually it put two and two together, "You're kidding me?" I whispered. "You have got to be kidding me?" I repeated, my voice steadily getting louder. "You are so not marrying my potions professor," I shouted before storming up the stairs to my room, and slamming the door as hard as I could.

I remember sliding down so that I was sitting on the floor with my back to the door. I pulled my knees up and rested my head against them, and started crying. It wasn't the fact that my mum was going to marry Snape that upset me. I was scared that he'd try to do something to me. He was a Slytherin and a Deatheater, as was Lucius and I was frightened that he would do something like him to me. 

Shadows stir at night through a crack in the door 

_Echoes of a broken child screaming please no more_

_Daddy don't you understand all the damage you have done_

_For you it's just a memory but for me it still lives on_

I just sat there crying for a few hours, before getting up and quietly opening the door. I crept down the hallway and paused at the top when I heard two voices downstairs, Snape and my mother.

"Narcissa please."

"I'm sorry Severus. You know I love you but Draco is the most important thing in my life. I want him to be happy, and if being with you makes him unhappy, then I'm afraid I don't have any choice."

"Narcissa, I know you love him, and it's incredibly obvious that he loves you just as much. But what about your own happiness? You can't live your life alone. What are you going to do when he gets married and moves out? Please Narcissa, think about it."

"He's right mum," I butted in, having walked down the stairs while I was listening to their conversation. "I think you should listen to him. You can get married. I was being selfish. But I'm scared mummy," I admitted quietly, momentarily forgetting he was there.

My mum got up and hugged me, "What are you scared of my dragon?"

I looked over at Severus, who shifted uncomfortably in his seat, "Do you want me to leave you alone?" he asked. I had never heard him sound so uncertain of himself, "No it's ok," I replied. "I'm scared that he'll be like Lucius," I told her.

She chuckled quietly, "Silly dragon," she said, kissing my hair. "Severus is nothing like Lucius, he won't hurt you in anyway."

"I would never think of laying a finger on you, Draco, ever."

I looked over at him, still uncertain, but then I saw it. A flicker of emotion showed in those normally cold black eyes. Honesty. He was telling me the truth and I couldn't help but begin to trust him.

I nodded, "You can marry him mummy."

"Thank you darling, I'm so glad we have your blessing."

Bruises fade father but the pain remains the same 

_And I still remember how you kept me so afraid_

I remember the wedding as if it was yesterday. It was at during the summer between fourth and fifth years. Dumbledore was more than happy to conduct the ceremony, as he believed that it was a brilliant time for people to join together, because Voldemort had risen and we were going to need to work together as much as possible.

The wedding was a formal Wizarding one. In fact the only person in robes was Dumbledore. Severus had a black tuxedo on, as did I. And my mother looked as beautiful as she always does.

She had a Muggle style wedding dress, designed by the best wizard fashion designer there is. The bodice was a corset made of deep red silk. The skirt was white and flowed away from her slim hips like water, and was trimmed with red material shaped like roses.

On the day of the rehearsal she had pulled me to the side and asked if I would give her away. I was stunned. I assumed that she was going to walk down the isle alone, as my grandfather had died five years prior.

The strength is my mother for all the love she gave 

_Every morning that I pray I look back at yesterday_

Just then there was a knock at the door. "Come in."

The door opened and my dad stuck his head around it, "Morning," he said. "Draco, have you seen-," he trailed off as he saw the little boy that was trying to hide himself in Harry's arms. "Xavier?" he finished. "Xav, why aren't you in your own bed?" he asked sternly.

"Xav had a nightmare about scary monsters, Severus," Harry explained. "So he asked if he could sleep in here with us."

Dad's features immediately became less stern, "Are you okay, Xav?"

Xav nodded, "I'm fine daddy. Harry and Draco protected me from the scary monsters."

He nodded then turned stern again, "Be that as it may, you still have to get up now. Otherwise you'll be late for school."

Xav groaned, "Daddy I don't want to go to school. Can't I just wait until I go to Hogwarts?" he pleaded.

"Xavier you have to go to school. Otherwise you won't be able to go to Hogwarts. If you can't read properly then you won't be able to learn how to do spells properly, then you'll never be a good wizard."

Xav looked at me and sighed, "You're right Dray."

I smiled at him, "Of course I am," I replied. "Now come on, get up and go get dressed."

Xavier reluctantly nodded and climbed out of the warmth of the covers, before walking out of the room, with Snowy following him.

"Thank you," dad mouthed at me, as Xav left.

"You're welcome," I mouthed back. Dad nodded and turned to leave the room, "Try not to spend all day in bed boys," I heard him say before he closed the door.

I turned to Harry, "Did he say what I think he said?" Harry nodded, and I blanched. I mean, I know my parents know that I'm not a virgin, it's not exactly something that I've kept secret from them, but the fact that my father thought that I was going to spend all day sleeping with my gorgeous boyfriend, was mildly disturbing. So what if it was probably true.

My train of thought was broken as I felt Harry push me onto my back, before balancing himself on top of me and kissing me deeply. And I'm not going to describe to you what happened next because it's private and romantic, just use your imaginations.

It's not so easy to forget all the marks you left along her neck 

_When I was thrown against cold stairs_

_And everyday afraid to come home in fear of what I might see next_

I have no idea why I decided to write all this down. Re-reading it now, I've just realised it probably makes no sense to anyone. It's just a bunch of incoherent thoughts all jumbled up and skips from the past, to the present and back to the past again. But that's the way my mind works, I always remember things from my past, even though I'd rather forget them. But things don't always go the way you planned, for instance, I certainly didn't plan on falling in love. And with Harry Potter of all people, yet I still did. And now I wouldn't change it for the world.

Maybe I'll send this to my _father. _And yes, that was sarcasm. For I do want him to know what he did to me, and how the way he treated myself and my mother, affected us. I also want him to know that I may have nightmares of the past, but now I'm happy. I have a wonderful mother, and father, a beautiful little brother and a gorgeous boyfriend, all of whom I love more than anything else in the world.

Know this Lucius, if you've got this far, you may think you're still my father, but you aren't. My real father is Severus Snape, and he had provided for me for all these years, as well as shown me more love than you ever did. I hope you realise just how unfortunate you are, when you think of everything that you let slip through your fingers.

Yours truly,

- Draco Snape.

Bruises fade father but the pain remains the same 

_And I still remember how you kept me so afraid_

_Strength is my mother for all the love she gave_

_And every morning that I wake I look back at yesterday_

_And I'm ok._


End file.
